65.5
that's how much i weighed this morning. it's ridiculous. i've put on 2.5 kg in four weeks. what the hell am i doing? why did i work so hard when i'm just going to let it go so easily?
we went to costco yesterday and they had a video camera set up on one of the tvs and i saw myself and i looked so fat i almost cried. i'm horrible, fat and disgusting. i tried to buy some new exercise clothes today and i didn't look right in anything. i'm too fat.
why did i get my boobs done when i'm just going to stay fat? what was the point?
we talked about rewards for exercising. i'll get the basic reward if i go to the gym three times a week on average, making it 12 times a month. the reward will be a full body massage by mark. the highest reward - for when i go to the gym 30 times a month, or 28 times in february - will be a full body massage and an expensive clothing item or a bag or shoes. we'll have to decide on rewards inbetween.
my dance mat came today. i was eager to try it but unfortunately it needs to be plugged into ps/2 port which mark's computer doesn't have (and mine doesn't either, even if it worked on a mac). we tried to buy it today but they didn't have it anywhere in the trafford centre so mark's going to some computer shop tomorrow morning.
on the diet front, i had a perfect eating day today. i also bought 'you are what you eat' magazine, see if there's anything interesting and helpful in it.
i'll be damned if i'll bloody gain next week!
we went to costco yesterday and they had a video camera set up on one of the tvs and i saw myself and i looked so fat i almost cried. i'm horrible, fat and disgusting. i tried to buy some new exercise clothes today and i didn't look right in anything. i'm too fat.
why did i get my boobs done when i'm just going to stay fat? what was the point?
we talked about rewards for exercising. i'll get the basic reward if i go to the gym three times a week on average, making it 12 times a month. the reward will be a full body massage by mark. the highest reward - for when i go to the gym 30 times a month, or 28 times in february - will be a full body massage and an expensive clothing item or a bag or shoes. we'll have to decide on rewards inbetween.
my dance mat came today. i was eager to try it but unfortunately it needs to be plugged into ps/2 port which mark's computer doesn't have (and mine doesn't either, even if it worked on a mac). we tried to buy it today but they didn't have it anywhere in the trafford centre so mark's going to some computer shop tomorrow morning.
on the diet front, i had a perfect eating day today. i also bought 'you are what you eat' magazine, see if there's anything interesting and helpful in it.
i'll be damned if i'll bloody gain next week!
posted by dianka at 11:38 pm
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